AreYouTheMarryingKind?

Everyone dreams of marrying the very best! Are you a match for that person?

A couple of well-meaning friends say they have the perfect match for you. Your potential match is of sound character, deeply spiritual, gorgeous, very well presented (fit too) CEO of a fortune five hundred company and single. You’re all excited! When can we meet? “Here’s my number” you say. “In fact, here’s my WhatsApp, Facebook, Instagram, email….my blood type and resume”.

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Pause. What in the world are you going to wear? That’s the least of your concerns, or should be anyway. Are YOU a match for that person? What are you bringing to the table? Have you ever wondered whether anybody should marry you? Singles often refer to desirable prospects as ‘ticking all the boxes’. Try this introspective approach: In one column, make a list of qualities that you should possess in order to be an excellent choice for marriage. In a second column, list your shortcomings, including flaws that only you and God know about.

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Two flaws that may pop up on your list include indiscipline and its cousin, slothfulness. Charles Stanley states that “Discipline determines your destiny” (Stanley, 2017). If you were to honestly answer the question, how is (my) character on a scale of one to ten – ten being the best? What would be your answer?

Thinking…

A slothful person or a sluggard is lazy. Such an individual has cultivated the habit of indiscipline. This person has dreams, and desires many things, but his/her own weakness of character prevents them from receiving the blessings they desire. What does the bible say about slothfulness? The soul of such a person craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied – Proverbs 13:4. Some slothful persons may seem temporarily rehabilitated, but will soon quit when things get tough. They get scared. They run away. They make excuses. They disappoint and are unreliable.

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Let’s strike a balance here. Everybody gets scared sometimes and nobody is quite perfect. The concern arises based on the fact that making one excuse for not keeping your word, or allowing circumstances (no matter how difficult) to deter you from following through, is one more step to being what displeases God – a sluggard – slothful. Undisciplined. Once trust is broken, no one wants to hear your rationale; or about your struggles, which I don’t deny may be quite real! Your character; your witness for Christ may be indefinitely stained.

A sluggard is an unstable person who is unstable in every way. More often than not, there emotions are messed up. They are unable to manage their finances, and/or unable to find ways of enhancing their current earnings, because they’re too slothful to see anything through. The sluggard is usually late and apologetic – full of excuses. This is the date who is always late, or who repeatedly cancels at the last moment, because of an obviously avoidable obstacle. This is one who has not disciplined his/her own mind, so that the body follows permissive thoughts into sin – sexual sin and gluttony! The sluggard might also lack confidence, because nothing they started in the past ever worked out (notice they never finished anything). An undisciplined person – a sluggard, wastes the gifts given by God.

“And such were some of you…” 1 Corinthians 6:11.

Sluggards want to get married too. They want to have two or three children who are just like them. Would you like to have sluggard’s phone number? Sluggard, if you’re reading, should anybody marry you? Would you not be a heavy load to carry, rather than an enhancement to the life of another?

This might sound tough, especially if you’re used to running away, or taking what seems to be the preferable if not easy way out. You may have had reasons to start running during your childhood. Those reasons may have catapulted you, unprepared into adulthood, with all the aims and desires that adults normally have, but with a child’s fragile heart. You may have found yourself running and running for years, but no matter how quickly you run, you find that you take your character with you.

STOP!

STOP! Indiscipline and slothfulness displease God, yet there is hope.
“…but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God” 1 Corinthians 6:11. “If We confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” 1 John 1:9. Every rule or commandment that God has given to us was given because He loved us. They’re less like lists of do’s and don’ts and more like “Please don’t(s) because this is going to cause you pain”.

You sigh, “I’ve spent so many undisciplined years. I feel it’s impossible to change now”. Is there anything too hard for God?

“Go to the ant, o sluggard, consider his ways and be wise” Proverbs 6:6.

References

Stanley, C. (2017, August 30). Discipline Determines Your Destiny. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rctlQhw2mZM&t=216s

The Bible.

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